ericboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- \"Confusing what is real\" - Linkin Park Random paths of self-destruction that we find ourselves so often going down... I can't understand how a person can get off work, clocking out promptly at the end of their shift, go straight home, and vegg out in front of a television or book and not think that there is something that they should be doing. I always think that there's something that I should be doing. I feel that I always have to be busy. I haven't written in my paper journal in God-knows-how-long. I just haven't slowed down long enough to do so. I imagine that it's partly because I don't know what to write in there. I've been keeping busy but, looking back, my exploits add up to nothing. I haven't really done anything. I want to change the world; to re-shape it to my liking. The sad part is that I hardly ever know what I want. I'm constantly reworking my opinions on just about everything, and when I'm not doing that, someone else is doing it for me. I'm constantly shown another course, another way of looking at things, and having my ideals and expectations dashed and replaced with harsh realities. How do you do it? More "True Stories" are to come in a series of signettes that I'd like to call "A Knight in Shining Stupid". These will chronicle all the bullshit that I've gone through in an effort to "do the right thing". And there's plenty, let me tell you. As I soon will... 9:26 p.m. - 2004-09-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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