ericboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- \"And if I only could / I'd make a deal with God...\" - Kate Bush Today has passed by effortlessly and harmlessly and yet I feel empty. I suppose the answer is there: no stress, no world pressing on me. What do I do when I'm not working? I smoke cigarettes and stare into the darkness and fantasize about a place that I can go where I can feel the love, stain, pressure, and heartache of the world around me. Where I can stand with arms held out and FEEL the remnants of a world that I'd dismissed as cold and uncompromising. Where I can FEEL... SOMETHING!!! Love is intense passion. Hate is intense passion. These are not opposites, contrary to popular belief. The opposite of intense passion is the lack of any emotion at all. The true antithesis of love is apathy. And I know this only too well. My footsteps seem hollow as I traverse land from one space to the next, in search, in transit, in Hell. I've had a revelation: that nothing that I do is conducive to revelatory thinking. Maybe it's time to make a change, but I can hardly make a sound. Breathe. 2:43 a.m. - 2003-12-02 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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