ericboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- overture sitting here at lestat's listening to a compilation of depressing music that i made for a friend of mine awhile back. in the background is moving classical music, so there's a definite sense of peace in my inner soul at the moment. despite the issues that trouble me aplenty, i feel relatively decent. i've resolved myself to bandaging the aspects of my life that are in need of first-aid: finances, goals, personal acceptance, general outlook. all of these could use some attention. there are a few creditors who would like to dine on meal-sized portions of my ass and i suppose that i should seek them out and appease them. not with ass, of course, but with their duly owed money. it's about time to go car shopping, so that's pressing me. i finally decided want i want for my birthday: a plane ticket home around christmastime. since this is one of the more expensive and personal gifts, i'll take it upon myself to secure this tiding of comfort and joy. that's the way that i am; i try not to burden others with the trivialities that i can provide myself. not that self-hugs are worth a shit, but that's in the same category. the coffee here is good. it's 5:39 in the morning so there's no one else here. i like that. i left the house and felt like being alone and here i am. i definitely need to start getting my arrangements arranged. after all, if they're not that, then what are they, really? i've never wanted to deny anyone the right to be what they are, but it seems like i'm doing just that. i need to get my life back up to operating order. no debts, if that's possible these days, and a clear path to financial independence. it's time to start acting like i plan to breathe tomorrow. the way i live my life, day to day, paycheck to paycheck, meal to meal, it doesn't seem that way at all. as it seems, i've got big plans for tomorrow, so it's time to clear the obstacles. not that it does much about today. i'll soon be learning words like "frugal" and "thrifty". no biggie, though. i'm no stranger to poverty. my, how i can ramble. 5:31 a.m. - 2003-06-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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